


Discard & Draw

by AniPendragon



Category: RWBY
Genre: Agender Character, Agender Ozpin, Angst, Gen, Lots of Angst, Post Volume 3, Temporary Character Death, Time Travel, Very Mild Ironqrow, What if fic, lots of temporary character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-16
Updated: 2016-03-16
Packaged: 2018-05-27 04:28:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6269686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AniPendragon/pseuds/AniPendragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Step back. Find your centre. Try again. Don't stop until you find the answer. There must be a way to fix it this time. There must be a way to save everyone.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Discard & Draw

**Author's Note:**

> Done to the rhythm of Sia's 'Chandelier' - specifically the first part of the chorus. Lots of angst, some mild background ironqrow, a sort of 'what if' fic based on Ozpin's powers and my own interpretation of their character.
> 
> Also agender Ozpin! Because if Ozpin's old as fuck, their gender gets to be an enigma too.
> 
> Comments are love.

**One**

The rubble surrounded Ozpin. Pinned them. Made their entire body feel heavy and awful. They blinked, found their glasses were gone, and squinted at the destroyed vault.

" _Neo!"_

" _Bet on THAT!"_

Ozpin shoved the rubble off and got to their feet. Swayed. Cane was gone as well. Someone must have taken it as proof of their going missing. Or their death. Ozpin couldn't be sure. They grabbed onto a fallen chunk of ceiling and leaned heavily. Their entire right side was awash with pain. Sharp, biting agony that had their vision spotting and their head swimming.

" _Yang, no!"_

" _Get away from her!"_

Another deep breath. Ozpin shuddered on the exhale. Tried not to think about the death that hung around Vale like a fog. The fear that clung to its every inch and threatened to leave Ozpin choking on the negativity until they collapsed all over again.

They took a few steps forward, shuddered at the pain again. Grabbed the next piece of rubble. They didn't need their cane for this. They just needed the last conjure location. Which was a pitiful twenty feet away. They could do this. They had to.

" _Lie, cheat, and survi-!"_

Two more feet. Then two more. Then two more. One step in front of the other. Shaking and quivering with every step, but they kept going. Too much death. Too much destruction. They wouldn't lose another person to this war. They needed to fix this.

Ten feet to go.

" _We aren't leaving without them."_

" _I have a plan."_

" _You always do."_

Six feet. Then five feet. Then four. Ozpin cried out as they fell to their knees. Pain blistered their hands and legs. Agony broke their skull into a thousand pieces. But still they kept going. Four feet. Then three. Then two. They just hoped they had enough magic left for this.

" _Do you believe in destiny?"_

" _Yes."_

" _Pyrrha!"_

Ozpin reached out and grabbed for the last piece of rubble. Dragged themselves over the spot where they'd last used their magic. Planted one hand on the centre and hissed the words they remembered best.

They could do this.

" _It's the beginning of the end, Ozpin. And I can't wait to watch you burn."_

The world went white. Gears and clocks and time spinning and spinning around them as everything spiralled into pain and fear and _green_.

And then it all disappeared.

* * *

**Two**

Ozpin woke up in their bedroom. The holographic clock on the wall told them it was a three weeks into second semester, and a few before they sent Team RWBY to the south side. With a sigh, Ozpin sat up and swung their legs off the bed. Ozpin reached for their cane, which was rested against the end table, as it always was.

"Okay," they said. "Okay." Not as far back as they wanted, but it would have to do. While their body was in good shape now, their mind and magic was still scattered. Another jump, like this, would leave them broken for weeks.

Ozpin got dressed, prepared themselves to look like they were supposed to, and headed up to their office. Perhaps if they sent Glynda with Team RWBY on the train, or if they stopped Roman beforehand. But that seemed unlikely.

In their office, Ozpin spent the day organizing plans, scanning solutions, and getting everything down to its core. _There must be a way._

Team RWBY was sent out with Bart. Ozpin slipped him the intel they had, told Bart to watch his back. And that worked out well. The breach was contained before it happened. Ozpin didn't lose power to the council this time.

And then the festival happened. And James' army wasn't as large. And Qrow and James weren't fighting as much.

And, for a few weeks at least, Ozpin thought they had figured it out.

* * *

**Three**

" _Penny!"_

" _Ozpin, about the girl-"_

" _You brought your army to my Kingdom, James. Use it!"_

Penny still fell. Cinder still rose. The city was still broken.

Ozpin sprinted through the city, stumbling on their bum leg and swearing more than once. Tried to find James or Qrow or Glynda or _someone_.

"Qrow!" A shout. James' shout. Ozpin turned, stumbled on a pothole and hit the ground on their hands and knees. Saw Qrow get stabbed through the back and through his stomach. Saw Qrow's eyes go dim. Heard James scream in rage and shoot the Grimm.

Ozpin stumbled to their feet and got to Qrow and James. The area clear, James cradled Qrow in his arms. Qrow raised one bloody hand and rested it on James' cheek.

"Hey, Jim," croaked Qrow. "You keep these kids safe for me, all right?"

James nodded and Ozpin saw the tears in his eyes.

"You bastard," croaked James. "I was going to ask you to marry me."

Qrow's eyes fluttered. "Damn," he whispered, voice hoarse. "I would've said yes, too."

Ozpin stumbled back from them, saw Glynda running toward them. They stared up at the Grimm all around in the sky. Jerked hard as a thousand new images slid into their head.

" _Velvet!"_

" _Where's Blake?"_

"Ozpin?" Glynda grabbing them by the shoulders.

Ozpin stared at her with wide eyes.

"I need go to back farther," they whispered. Glynda narrowed her eyes, confusion evident on her face. But then there were more Grimm in the air and James was still curled over Qrow's cold body. She was the only one left to fight.

Ozpin ran. Stepped forward, let the gears and clocks and _white_ surround them.

" _I got ya. I got ya."_

* * *

**One**

Farther this time. When Ozpin woke up, it was the beginning of the second semester. Before the train. Before the food fight. Before everything. They could do it this time.

Up in their office, Ozpin called up Qrow and Taiyang. Maybe if Qrow came sooner this time, taught the girls about winning and losing before they started falling. Maybe that would fix it. There were other things as well. Things that Ozpin needed to sort out on their own, but Qrow would be a good start.

Taiyang still hated Ozpin, but that was to be expected. Ten years in the dark and two missing and/or dead wives tended to do that to a man. Ozpin couldn't very well blame him, especially not with how guilty they still felt about it all.

Qrow arrived a week later, not too long after James arrived. Ozpin saw the way they looked at each other. Saw the fights and fires building up around them. Ozpin could only hope that it levelled out without Winter here for Qrow to aggravate.

Then it was time to move on. Talk to Glynda, talk to Bart. Sort things out.

They could do this. They could save everyone this time.

* * *

**Two**

This time didn't even make it to the festival. Bartholomew died in the caves and Ozpin lost focus. Stumbled around in their plan until they knew Cinder had the upper hand. Qrow's arguing grew desperate. James' army grew restless. Cinder was winning. Ozpin debated striking her down – killing her before she could finish.

It wasn't worth the risk.

" _We stay the course. They have no idea we're here."_

They knew. They knew. They knew. And they didn't do anything. Was that why everything kept going to hell? How did they stop something they couldn't prove existed?

" _Can your children fight a war?"_

" _I hope they never have to."_

The festival never happened. Cinder's plans accelerated with the breach happening the way she wanted. There weren't enough students, nor teachers, nor soldiers, to stop what happened. Vale fell. The battle raged on. Half of Beacon died and so did so, so many others.

Bartholomew was dead. Peter was mourning. The students fell. The army fell. Everyone _fell_. And Ozpin watched it all. Trying to fight, unable to focus, unable to die.

_Step back. Find your centre. Start again._

_Where did it all begin?_

The world went white.

* * *

**Three**

Further this time. Back to Amber. Told Qrow where she was in hopes of stopping Cinder from killing her. It didn't work. Qrow died. James blamed Ozpin. Glynda blamed Ozpin.

Ozpin blamed Ozpin.

Amber still died. This time, no one saved her. This time, no one stopped the process. This time, Cinder got all the power she needed long before she needed it.

This time Ozpin didn't know all the pieces.

Cinder never came to Beacon. Ruby never came to Beacon. She wasn't in the right place at the right time. RWBY didn't form. Weiss and Blake and Yang scattered to other teams.

No one to stop Roman. No one to befriend Penny. No one to show the world just how powerful the students could be.

Cinder rose. Vale fell. Everyone died. Ozpin stood in the centre, watching.

_Step back. Start again. There must be a way to save everyone._

* * *

**Drink**

Ozpin stepped into Junior's bar, a week before Roman Torchwick would arrive. They weren't dressed like themself. But the glasses and cane remained, and they knew that Junior recognized them.

"What'll it be?" asked Junior, standing behind the bar.

"Strongest thing you've got," said Ozpin, voice raspy. "Make it a double."

The drink was slid in front of them. Ozpin downed it in one go. Tapped the counter for another one. Leaned over the bar and scowled into the smooth black surface. The music and the lights didn't register. Nothing but a thousand images swirling behind their mind.

" _They say you know everything."_

"You're Ozpin, aren't you?" asked Junior, wiping a glass. Ozpin nodded. "What's a guy like you doing here?"

"Not a guy," said Ozpin, absently. Realized a second too late what they'd said.

Junior's eyebrows were up. "They?" he guessed. Ozpin nodded, eyes darting back to the counter. "Simple enough, sorry." Ozpin shrugged. It wasn't like anyone but the teaching staff at Beacon knew – them and James and Qrow, anyway.

"So what's a person like you doing in a place like this?" asked Junior. Another shrug. Ozpin downed the second drink and tapped for another. Junior narrowed his eyes and poured another drink.

"Do you know a man named Roman Torchwick?" asked Ozpin. They ran their finger around the rim of the third drink.

Junior cocked his head to one side. "Can't say I do," he said after a moment. "Why?"

"He'll be visiting you, soon enough," said Ozpin, quietly. "Don't let him leave without talking to him."

Junior raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

Ozpin looked up at Junior, glasses sliding down their face. "He's desperate. He's had his daughter taken from him. Ask him why he wants your men. Ask him if you can help. He doesn't need to get into this anymore than he already has."

Junior nodded, slowly. His brow was furrowed and his lips were pursed in confusion. "All right," he said. "Look, are _you_ all right?"

Ozpin downed the drink and stood up. "No," said Ozpin. "But I haven't been in years."

* * *

**One**

Ruby ended up in Beacon this time. Amber still ended up in stasis. That was something Ozpin couldn't change. But _maybe_ if they could force Cinder into the transfer chamber, they could save Amber. Maybe…

Team RWBY formed. It was easy enough to make sure they all picked the same pieces. Ozpin had had enough practice with this part of the equation. JNPR formed. Sun showed up. So did Penny. This time, Ozpin pulled James aside and asked him about the girl. Got the truth and explained that they thought Penny was wonderful. But that she should be allowed to learn to be a _person_ before she learned to be a _hero_.

James agreed. Penny didn't leave after the fight with Roman this time.

Penny learned how to be a person. She confided in Ruby without having to be forced into it. Maybe, just maybe, this would change something too.

" _You've got a heart and a soul. I can feel it."_

Breach. Festival. Fall. _Don't tell Pyrrha about the maidens_. She stayed happy. Emerald was dragged away by a special mission the day before Penny and Pyrrha's match. It should have been perfect. It should have been fine.

It wasn't. Because Cinder walked out on stage and turned Penny to ash with a touch.

" _Penny, no."_

Another speech. Another Grimm invasion. Another fall.

Ruby's powers cut loose in the arena. Everything froze except Cinder and Ruby. Ozpin broke free to bolt for Ruby just as Cinder's arrow pierced her heart.

" _Do you believe in destiny?"_

" _Yes."_

_Step back. Start again. Find your centre. You can save everyone._

_You_ have _to save everyone._

* * *

**Two**

There had to be a sweet spot. A time, a place, an _event_ that was the perfect spot to start over. Ozpin couldn't find it. A dozen jumps – or was it two? Or three? They couldn't tell anymore – and there was no special, secret spot that was the key to it all.

They went back farther this time. Cornered Amber before she left. Told her what they'd seen coming. Amber stayed home with Winter. Stayed away from Cinder.

It didn't work.

Cinder cornered Amber and Winter on a walk through the park. Between Mercury, Emerald, and Cinder…

Winter died. Amber lost it. James was the one to break up the fight and bring Amber to Ozpin.

" _She's the one responsible for Autumn's condition."_

Taiyang nearly killed Ozpin when they showed up at his house in Patch. Ozpin saw what it took for Taiyang not to reach out and strangle them.

"What do you want?"

"To talk to your daughters."

Taiyang snarled and went to shut the door. Qrow caught it instead and gave Tai a meaningful look.

"You talk to us first," Qrow said and Ozpin nodded. It was only right.

" _Ruby Rose, you have silver eyes."_

She came to Beacon knowing that she had a role in Ozpin's plan this time. Maybe it wasn't fair to her, to do this to her. To tell her she was special from the get-go. But she was always going to come to Beacon. She was always going to be special. Maybe honesty was where Ozpin had gone wrong in the past.

* * *

**Three**

Yang died. Ruby died. Weiss and Blake stood alone against Cinder in the vault. Ozpin had never wanted them down here. Pyrrha was on the surface, shouting orders at people with military precision.

They didn't know where Qrow was. Dead, maybe, like his nieces.

Weiss conjured. Blake created copies. Both were screaming and in tears.

Cinder cut them down like they were nothing. And Ozpin wasn't fast enough. Not this time.

" _Coffee?"_

" _Tea."_

They died next to their partners.

Ozpin attacked Cinder with everything they had. She fell. Ozpin felt the fire in their veins as the Fall Maiden's power tried to seep into them. They stepped away, let it drift off.

_Step back. Find your centre. Start over._

_There must be a way._

* * *

**One**

Summer Rose couldn't be saved. Ozpin had long since given up that chain of events. But maybe there was something else there. Maybe if they told…

" _Qrow, what are you doing here?"_

"What do you want, Ozpin?" asked Qrow.

Ozpin leaned in the door of Taiyang's house. Tai was out with the girls. School hadn't started yet.

"I need to tell you about the future," said Ozpin. And they walked into the house, slid Qrow the strongest alcohol they'd been able to find, and told him everything.

And afterward, Qrow stared at Ozpin like they'd grown a second head.

"So the fall of Vale – the fall of Autumn… it starts Salem back up?" asked Qrow. Ozpin nodded. "And that's why you have to stop it?"

No. "Yes." Mostly. _You have to save everyone._

"How many times have you tried to fix this?" asked Qrow.

"Too many," said Ozpin. They stared into their coffee cup and sighed. "I can't do it alone."

"Evidently." Qrow sighed. "What do you need?"

* * *

**Two**

James slammed Ozpin into the wall and snarled. Ozpin let the pain ground them. Let the thousand images of this day swirl around them like a tornado, with James and them at the eye.

"He's dead because of you!" shouted James, his eyes filled with tears. "If you'd _trusted_ me." Broken voice. Anger and fear and pain mixing together. Ozpin looked away.

"I could have done _something_ , I could have saved him." James let go of Ozpin. Ozpin slid to the ground, feet touching down lightly. Pain and agony blistered their right leg. They didn't care.

" _Personally, I think it's the other way around."_

"James…"

"Don't." Sharp. Angry. Ozpin looked away.

" _Name's Qrow."_

"I told him the truth. I thought he could help me."

"Then why not tell me too?" asked James. He clenched his fists. "Why ask him to keep that from me?"

Ozpin couldn't look at James. Couldn't say they were sorry, because they weren't. They thought this would work.

"I'm going back to Atlas."

"What about the enemy?"

"You can deal with her yourself."

They couldn't.

Cinder rose. Vale fell. The maiden's power went to Salem.

" _Why have you called me here?"_

* * *

**Three**

Winter. Summer. Spring. Fall. The four maidens they had once created. The four women who'd shown Ozpin what it meant to live.

After their deaths, the powers had never been on a team again. Ozpin had hoped to change that. Hoped that they could bring the four maidens back together to destroy Salem once and for all.

It hadn't worked.

It had cost Amber her life.

" _I want to be strong."_

Ozpin's world swirled around them, flicker-flashes of memories and events that had – hadn't – had – hadn't – happened. Yet? Or ever? They couldn't tell anymore.

" _I want to be feared."_

When had Salem been able to get under their skin like this? Of course, Ozpin knew that they'd always cared too much about the pieces in the game that they and Salem played. But it wasn't right. It wasn't fair. How did Salem manage this?

The world spun. Nothing solidified. Everyone was dead. Vale was in ruins.

" _I want to be powerful."_

Ozpin took a deep breath. Opened their eyes.

_Step back. Start over. Find your centre. Look to the past and look to the future._

_You can do this._

_You_ have _to do this._

The world went white.

* * *

**Drink**

Qrow's flask was amidst the wreckage of this latest attempt. Ozpin picked it up and felt the liquid slosh around it in. They took a swing. Leaned heavily on their cane. Kept walking.

The world was falling apart around them.

The dragon in the tower screamed and followed Ozpin, but never circled close. It knew Ozpin's power. Knew they could kill it if they wanted.

The dragon didn't know Ozpin didn't want it dead. The dragon held answers. It had to.

And if it didn't. Well. The dragon was one of the few things in this world almost as old as Ozpin.

" _This is your home now."_

Ozpin took another swing. Downed more than they meant to. The world swayed. The edges were white.

Another swing. How many was that? Ozpin didn't know anymore.

Everyone was dead.

_What was the point?_

Another swing.

_Step back._

They were running out of patience. Running out of energy. Running out of empathy.

_Start again._

There had to be a way. But what? Ozpin didn't know anymore.

_Find your centre._

Cinder couldn't be allowed to rise.

_There must be a way to save everyone._

* * *

**One**

Ruby Rose ran alongside Ozpin as they bolted for the tower. This time, they'd come out of the tower. This time, they'd fought in the streets with the others. This time, Ozpin had told Ruby that she should be the Fall Maiden. This time, the burden was hers to bear, and she bore it with pride.

"We have to get to the vault," said Ozpin, cane gripped tightly in one hand.

" _I want to be a Huntress."_

"On it!" shouted Ruby, and she grabbed Ozpin around the middle and they were gone in a flurry of rose petals.

" _You want to slay monsters."_

The vault was already destroyed. They were too late. Ozpin went after the dragon. Ruby went after Cinder. They didn't know the second part until it was too late. When they realized, they ran after Ruby.

Too little, too late.

" _Do you believe in destiny?"_

" _Yes."_

The world went white.

* * *

**Two**

_Step back. Start over. Try again._

Taiyang slammed Ozpin into a wall.

Pyrrha died four months later.

_You can do this._

"Ozpin, what is your problem?"

Glynda fell by Cinder's hand.

_You_ have _to do this._

Ozpin watched the dragon fall, Ruby Rose's lifeless body stuck between its jaws.

They screamed.

_You can't do this._

* * *

**Three**

The first day of school, Ozpin's speech was disoriented and distant, harsh but caring. They couldn't keep anything straight. Couldn't see past the thousands of images that tore through their mind daily anymore. They needed a way to determine which ones were important. But it seemed impossible.

Landing strategies. Team formations. All familiar. All the same.

Was same a good thing this time around?

They didn't know anymore.

" _Team RWBY, led by Ruby Rose."_

Fast forward. Still the same. Rewind, try again.

Pyrrha died.

Ruby screamed.

The dragon froze.

What were they missing?

* * *

**One**

" _Penny, what's going on?"_

This time, it all fell apart sooner. Qrow arrived sooner. James left sooner. They fought. Glynda fought. Everyone fought.

Cinder rose. Vale fell.

" _Welcome to Beacon."_

What were they missing?

* * *

**Two**

" _Ice queen."_

" _Hey!"_

Maybe Weiss and Winter were the answer. Their semblances were strong. If Weiss could master conjuring sooner. If Winter was loyal to Ozpin as well as James. Or if James was willing to send her out into the battle…

" _Heiress, actually."_

So they told James. They told James about their fears and their worries and their want to keep Winter close. And James, touched by Ozpin's honesty, kept her around. And if that made Qrow and Winter fight more. Well, Ozpin could handle it. Even if it did bother James. They could handle it. They all could handle it.

Winter was in the final battle. Winter was killed in the final battle. James fell alongside her.

Qrow would have killed Ozpin for that, if Ozpin hadn't been trapped by Cinder.

" _But… Ozpin…"_

_Step back. Start over. Try again._

The world blurred around Ozpin. Exhaustion clung to their bones. They no longer knew peace.

_You have to do this._

_There is no 'can't.'_

* * *

**Three**

Taiyang wasn't the answer.

" _I'm just glad to have my girls home."_

Qrow wasn't the answer.

" _Or did you just not give a damn?"_

James and Glynda and Winter weren't the answer.

" _You idiot."_

So what was? What was Ozpin missing? Why couldn't they figure out what was going on?

" _Man, born from dust…"_

Salem's mocking words danced around Ozpin as the timelines blurred together.

* * *

**Drink**

Ozpin drank deeply from their glass in their office. Leaned back in their chair and debated a cigarette. It had been years, but it would make them feel better. Ozpin poured themself another glass and drained it again.

The world was fuzzy. The memories were distant, less like memories and more like half-forgotten stories. The tattoos on their arms hummed with the warmth of the alcohol.

Dust tattoos didn't react well to alcohol. It never stopped Ozpin from drinking.

Wasn't like they could live without alcohol, at this point.

Ozpin drank again.

What were they missing?

It was a question they'd asked themselves a thousand times. Maybe more. Maybe less. It wasn't like they could tell anymore. Wasn't like there was any way to know.

Wasn't like it mattered, anyway. No one else knew.

Ozpin drank again.

" _Just turn it off. Without the CCT, there's no point."_

What was missing?

" _What, I can't stay here?"_

Ozpin drank again. The alcohol blurring past and present and future together until they couldn't tell which was which.

* * *

**Through 'Em Back**

" _Do you believe in destiny?"_

" _Yes."_

Ozpin woke up. Two weeks before classes started. Ozpin visited Junior. Told him about Roman coming to visit him. Drank until they stumbled and left. Went and found Blake Belladonna, offered her a position in the school. Went and found Jaune Arc's transcripts, fixed the mistakes and put him through for enrollment. Called Qrow. Checked on Amber.

_What was the point?_

They stood. Waited for the call from Glynda. Went and found Ruby Rose. Smiled at her. Started the speech all over again.

" _Do you know who I am?"_

" _You're Professor Ozpin."_

Cinder rose. Vale fell.

What was the point?

_Step back. Start over._

Ozpin did. The world went white.

* * *

' **Til I Lose Count**

" _The night you met Ozpin, what was the first thing he said to you?"_

Ozpin took a deep breath and walked into the room with Ruby Rose. Handed her the cookies and gave a knowing look to Glynda.

Flash forward. Pyrrha was dead. Ruby screamed. Cinder rose. Vale fell.

Back. Went through the motions of inviting Blake. Found Jaune's transcripts. Watched Ruby take on Roman.

Flash forward. Ruby was dead. Pyrrha screamed. The dragon rose further.

Back. They smiled at Ruby.

" _I... I don't know. I think it was something about..."_

Ruby smiled at them and took a few cookies, ate them like she hadn't eaten in days. Which wasn't true, but all teenage hunters ate like that.

Forward – death.

Back – beginnings.

Ozpin took a deep breath.

" _Ruby Rose, you have silver eyes."_

_Step back. Start over. Find your centre. There must be a way to save everyone. There must be a way to win._

_There just_ had _to be._

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Tumblr.](http://anipendragon.tumblr.com/)


End file.
